Wolff rating: FAIR
Plot summary: An incompetent fish-tank cleaner decides to become, in his words, a ``man-whore.''
Biased, pithy comments: Hollywood occasionally makes near-talentless people powerful enough to realize their vision. In this case, producer Adam Sandler's greasy pawprints are all over the concept, writing, and execution of this inane show. He knows nothing about the male escort business, nor does he bother to find out. Instead, he makes up nonsense words like ``man-gina'' and ``she-bitch man-slap'' and you can hear him snorting away over a lunch of burgers and Ruffles as he watches the dailies. In fact, his worldly experience is so narrow that he can't imagine under what circumstance a woman would ever want to hire someone to have sex; his brow furrows under the strain---only broken, unattractive women would ever need such a service, he decides. Thus, the string of women in the film are all rejects and losers, and we're meant to laugh at them and their loneliness. Ha ha, they're losers! The writing is again a collection ideas thrown together, and every set-piece telegraphed where it was going so early that I had plenty of time to expect it; heck, want it to be over with. I see a fishtank, I say, ``It's going to break.'' I see him put a sandwich in the toaster, I say, ``It's going to catch fire.'' It's just not funny when you can spot the joke on the horizon, and then watch it make its leaden way to the forefront. OK, now that that invective is out, I can say this---I did giggle now and then, usually when the actors had added something to the film that couldn't have been in the script (like Griffin's food in the jacuzzi), but those laughs were in an acre of mediocrity around them. Kudos to Schneider for soldiering through it, and clearly they had fun putting the thing together, but any movie that sinks low enough to do three obvious Matrix parodies isn't probably worth your simoleons to see.
Other Notes: Yo, Sandler! ``Gigolo'' is already a male-only term; it's like saying ``male prostate.''
How many times I have seen it: x1
Starring: Rob Schneider, William Forsythe, Eddie Griffin, Arija Bareikis, Oded Fehr, and Gail O'Grady.
Directed by: Mike Mitchell